Caring Characters

I'll always be my own worst critic of my parenting. I will forever feel like I should have a "bad mom" stamp on my forehead. I let my child watch lots of TV, I don't buy her stuff often, and I am particular about play dates. I'm the worst!

There's a lot where I feel less bad, though. I struggle when I see the traits that I loathe about myself come out in her. One habit I have is having a hard time when plans change. She amplifies it more than I do. So I've been working on it with her. I've explained, "It's okay to be upset and disappointed. It's frustrating when things change but sometimes they do. How about since we can't do what was planned we try something else?" It's been a process.

It's hard to tell how much good you're doing, too! Are you even making a difference? Last week there was an incident that just showed me, that indeed, I'm not doing so terribly after all.

We had stumbled upon a packed and scheduled day. There was a play date, horseback riding lessons and 2 birthday parties to attend. I took a huge step back and a huge deep breath knowing that I was in for an exhausting day. Friday I went to bed early in preparation.

Saturday I woke up to texts from my daughter's horseback riding instructor informing me that she could not be there and we had no sub for her lesson. It was a weird blessing in disguise for us, but the reason for the cancellation was her instructor's mother had been in a car accident and was stable and okay, but recovering. I explained to my daughter that her instructor's mom was "sick" and I was sorry that her plans changed. 

My daughter paused and said, "Mom is the rest of the day normal? I'm playing with my friend and we're going to both parties?" I said, "yes." She said, "Mom I'm not sad that I can't go to horseback riding lessons, but I'm really sad that my instructor's mom is sick and I hope she gets better." 

I just melted internally. I commended her for her reaction and thoughtfulness. These are the moments that make every argument and every single sassy moment count. These are the reminders that maybe I'm not the worst.

This morning my daughter received the Kindergarten character award for "Caring." She was so proud and so excited. I was probably just as proud and excited, but kept my cool. I love that I'm raising a caring kid. I love that I'm raising a good character, in more ways than one.

It's funny how her independence makes her a little care-giver sometimes. She has some serious "only-child" moments, but she is fiercely protective of her friends and family. That is one of those qualities I like to think I passed on to her, and will serve her well.

It's funny what we take pride in with our children as they grow. I love my child's vocabulary. The other day we were saying something about the way her dad does something and my awesome 6 year old said, "I agree!" She also talks about losing her "privileges" a lot, because we threaten that as a consequence, and I think it's safe and accurate to say that she doesn't stop talking. Seriously, I dare you to test this.

I love her imagination and ability to be independent and do her own thing but also love her socialization time. I love how tenacious she is when she wants to figure out stuff on her own. I love that she's a creature of habit like me. She's kind of just the best, but I may be biased.

Her character is still developing but I love watching as much of it as I'm lucky enough to have. She's a caring character, and my greatest blessing. I adore her to no end. Even when she drives me insane, I love her the most. And I can't wait to spend the 3 day weekend with my little caring character!